If he hit you? - Page 11

ha. its not that you challenged my opinon what are you on about. you just sound very smart. your response says it all really.

[quote="HappyGal":1b93qogv]ha. its not that you challenged my opinon what are you on about. you just sound very smart. your response says it all really.[/quote:1b93qogv] I don't want to continue dragging this off topic, so this will be the end of it for me. You really should read back over the replies I've posted. You asked a question that I had already answered. Then you childishly became personal, saying I'm getting "funny" and "being smart". I don't agree with you on this issue, it's as simple as that. We could agree on a myriad of other things in life but on this one, I have a totally different opinion to yours. It's really no big deal. It's got your back up for some reason. Perhaps you're used to people agreeing with you all the time. Would you feel better if I added one of these on the end?

this will be the end of it for me also. I just think, you should look at a bigger picture and give the girl some sound advice instead of the lovely one liner you came out with..... thats all... i cant stand people who are blunt , and could hurt someones feelings. wont be checking this post again.

I read over this post yesterday and didn't respond, thinking that possibly in my haste I would say the wrong thing....but in thinking through I'm still at the same position. I also talked with my H2B about this too, and we both agreed. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds to me like there is a little underlying drinking problem here. The first thing you said was that he said he was going to quit drinking?! Has this been an issue before? If he hit you by accident the first time and he honestly didn't know he did, his reaction to you hititng him on the back was severe at the least. If he turned and hit you out of reflex, why did he not apologize for the mistake right there and then!?!? H2B and I agreed that if it was by accident then you're immediate reaction would be to comfort and say sorry, not trash the house for another 40 minutes. Sounds to me (again I'm reading into the situation a little, so please correct me if I'm wrong) that there is something more to this story than what you are saying. I'm sure when he was trying to leave you were trying to pull him back but that does NOT give him the right to strike you at all, especially not in the FACE!!!!! What you choose to do is your life, but if I were in the situation how I see it, he would be out the door.

GO - and I would run out the door - sod kicking him out - he'd still know where I was and be able to let himself in and try to win me around by promising the sun moon and stars - no way - I'm sorry but no matter how much you love a guy if he raises his hand to you once you are only kidding yourself that he won't do it again, life is full of hard knocks and disappointments, what if he can't deal with the frustration he feels when work or something isn't going his way, who do you think he'l take it out on only the person closest to him - If I got a slap off a guy there would be NO going back - number would be changed and I would vanish from his life - Completely unforgivable and unforgettable I personally have a savage temper - and I really do my best to control it but sometimes I seriously flip - BUT I have NEVER been violent - I scream and shout and stamp but it has been ingrained into my consciousness that I can NEVER hit another person and so never have - if he thought it was ok ot hit u once he WILL do it again

I work in DV sector - GO GO GO GO GO!

If he did it once he will do it again.. Go.. Or kick his ass out d door...

It is easy to say to go when you are not actually in the situation and experiencing the emotions of it all and its hard to get to grips with the entirity of the situation here. Although I personally would go myself. It is no life for anyone and leads to low self esteem.

Personally I would go but as some people have pointed out not all situations are the same. I'm sure that there are some people out there who have changed and not hit again. I think if the person is genuinely remorseful and willing to seek help for the problem then it might be worth a second chance. But definately not a third.

[quote="HappyGal":2uq42pi8]I would say to ANYONE who is in an abusive relationship , [b:2uq42pi8]and it is a constant thing[/b:2uq42pi8], to get the hell out. i.... im just trying to give advice on what I am reading... .[b:2uq42pi8]she is not in an abusive relationship[/b:2uq42pi8].. but if it happened [b:2uq42pi8]again[/b:2uq42pi8], that YES 100% i would not walk run out that door!! [/quote:2uq42pi8] Three things: 1) The original post is 7 months old - why have you dragged it up again? 2) There is no 'number' of times you have to be hit for it to constitute an abusive relationship. He slapped her, she slapped him - thats abuse. It doesnt need to be 'constant' before it counts as unacceptable. 3) If someone is physically violent towards you at any stage then you should leave them. As another poster put it so well - 'til death do us part doesn't mean til one of you kills the other'