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Im so depressed

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sweeneytodd Posts: 29
I put a post on earlier today about h2b snapping at me, we have been fighting for the last 2 days now its awful, basically he says that im expecting him to be perfect and that he is going to snap at me now and then and im too sensitive! I just dont know what to do, im sittng here crying my eyes out, i cant even bear to look at him at the moment, i just dont know how anyone can say that it is ok to snap at people, even if its only now and then, im just so sick of it, as i said earlier its always over something stupid, and i cant live my life waiting for someone to jump down my neck over something ridiculous, he is gone out right now and i feel like geting his clothes and throwing them outside the door..why the hell do men have to be so selfish and so much trouble( sorry if im offending any good guys out there) at the end of the day i think everybody is capable of controlling snappishness, he wouldnt speak to his boss like that..its bullshit to say he has no control of it..anyway sorry for going on im just so miserable right now..and angry :o( >:o(
MrsTiredbride Posts: 3397
You always end up blowing up at those nearest and dearest to you. Little fights are part and parcel of a healthy relationship to be honest. You just said he snaps at you so I presume that he looses his cool over something stupid but I don't knwo as you don't say.
Sheep Posts: 626
Have you tried talking to him about it when he's totally calm? Maybe he genuinely doesn't realise what he's doing to you. If you can talk it through and figure out the reasons for him snapping at you and make him more conscious of his actions then maybe he will be able to work towards stopping it. Ok so arguments are always going to happen but constant snapping shouldn't be part of a relationship. You need to explain to him that you're not asking him to be perfect. You just want to be shown a little bit of respect and if he has an issue he's to talk to you, not snap at you and upset you. Ask him if there's anything wrong and if he's happy with your relationship.
Mayeston Posts: 315
Personally i think i'd be walking on eggshells if i felt like himself could snap at me at any moment. We all have our bad days. I can be a bit snappy with himself an odd time but i've never cursed at him. There's a difference from being snappy to being aggressive. He sounds like he speaks to you in a very disrespectful way sometimes and i think its important to deal with that. We all have our fights but its the below the belt comments that are hard to take. He cant expect to lash out at you...at seemingly innocent things...weetabix...a stool??? and then expect everythign to be hunky dory. how does he react when you're having a real fight? Does he handle those well? I suppose if i was marrying someone liek that i'd be wondering if we had children would he snap at them? how would they feel seeing there mother being snapped at by their father?
cupcakebabe Posts: 2232
Have you tried counselling? It might help? Does he realise how much it hurts you when he is like this? Approach him at a time when yous are not arguing and try and speak to him camly about it.
MrsTiredbride Posts: 3397
[quote="Mayeston":2i4uklga]I suppose if i was marrying someone liek that i'd be wondering if we had children would he snap at them? how would they feel seeing there mother being snapped at by their father?[/quote:2i4uklga] Do you not ever get pretty short with your h2b. Is there never a day when although they've done very little to bug you there's the straw that breaks the camels back so to speak that makes you lash out at them (even though it might have something to do with the stresses and strains of life in general and not you). I freely admit I get a little "snappy" the odd time and it's my darling h2b who has to listen. Granted we're together long enough for him to know that it's just life in general and not to take it personally and for that matter I dont do it in front of the world. edit - by the way there's no such thing as perfect movie love relationship. There will be ups and downs in every relationship.
Mayeston Posts: 315
Do we have our arguments? Yes of course we do! Have we snapped in a bad mood? Yes but rarely to be honest! Have i ever called him a name? No! Have i ever belittled him? No! Has he ever done that to me? No not once! We have the argument and argue on the points...i dont need to make him feel small to make myself the victor in an argument. And yeah life isn't all movie love moments but we're best friends and during those stressfull horrible days in life i lean on him for support not lash out at him! Fighting is fine. It's a normal part of every relationship. One person feeling bad all the time and walking around on eggshells is not! [quote="tiredbride":73whw9vn][quote="Mayeston":73whw9vn]I suppose if i was marrying someone liek that i'd be wondering if we had children would he snap at them? how would they feel seeing there mother being snapped at by their father?[/quote:73whw9vn][/quote:73whw9vn] Do you not ever get pretty short with your h2b. Is there never a day when although they've done very little to bug you there's the straw that breaks the camels back so to speak that makes you lash out at them (even though it might have something to do with the stresses and strains of life in general and not you).
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