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Mums and Depression

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Princess09 Posts: 821
Looking for a bit of advice on this situation. My mam suffers from depression, she's on medication for it and the majority of the time she's perfect however about once a year she usually has a really bad patch. And I get the feeling there's one on the way. Spoke to her today and she said herself and my dad went to a shopping centre as she wanted to go clothes shopping (to be honest I feel that is part of the problem, that is all my mam likes to do go clothes shopping, my dad has a great social life, and my mam through her own choice, will usually stay at home and doesn't work) She told me they only spent 5 mins at this particular shopping centre they had driven 2 hrs to get to!! When I asked why, she said cos my dad wasn't in the place he said he'd be when she came out of M&S (he was in an electrical shop paying for something!!) When they got home she tore her passport into shreds and threw it into the bin, as my dad had booked them both a holiday for during the summer!! This crazy behaviour drives me mad O:| all I want to say is "[i:1dnjul38][b:1dnjul38]snap out of it and occupy your life with some hobby that you have control of and don't need to rely on others all of the time[/b:1dnjul38][/i:1dnjul38]" but def not the best thing to say to someone who feels like this! It's also so frustrating as 90% of the time my mam and dad get on great. It must be really hard for my dad to put up with this. I'm just really worried as she has OD'd on her medication before and was really lucky! Anyone have similar situation? Great weekend for it also with mothers day!
roma2011 Posts: 1208
Oh you poor thing, what a horrible situation to have to watch develop, and it must be very tough for your Dad too. I don't have anything helpful to say at all, having never been in this type of situation myself. I know my H2Bs ex got very erratic before Xmas and after a particularly dramatic episode which resulted in her being hospitalised it emerged that she hadn't been taking her medication for the previous three or four weeks. So maybe try make sure she is taking her meds properly, or if you are certain that she is maybe try talk to her or your Dad about having her meds changed. Sorry I'm not much help! At least you can come on here and talk about it, and us Wollies will always be here to listen. :action32
gone elsewhere Posts: 1780
I feel for you, and I know exactly what it feels like. My mum suffered from depression for a long time and was hospitalised twice with it. [quote="Princess09":pw31ul59] This crazy behaviour drives me mad O:| all I want to say is "[i:pw31ul59][b:pw31ul59]snap out of it and occupy your life with some hobby that you have control of and don't need to rely on others all of the time[/b:pw31ul59][/i:pw31ul59]" but def not the best thing to say to someone who feels like this! [/quote:pw31ul59] You're right, it's really not the right thing to say. You wouldn't tell a cancer sufferer to pull themselves together. Just because there's no bandage/crutch with depression doesn't mean it's not a serious illness. From my own experience I'd say there's nothing you can do but be there for your mum and your dad. It's not her fault. Given the choice she'd rather not feel the way she does. Hugs in your direction, I know it's hard.
gwumpy Posts: 182
My Dad suffers from Bipolar Depression - is on a lot of medication and has been in hospital so many times that I can't remember. There are times when I want to do as OP said and tell him to get a hobby etc BUT I try to remember what we were told - that depression is an illness and can sometimes control the sufferer. And that it also affects the family. Now this is really hard to remember especially during the rough patches. O:| O:| All I can say to ya is that I totally identify with you - I sometimes worry about what he'll do or day on wedding day. AWARE is a great support organisation. There are other ones as well. PM me if ya ever want to chat
cat woman Posts: 897
ah really sorry to hear about your mam , has she gone for counseling, does her depression occur at a certin time of year, maybe something happened in the past and that's why she gets really down in herself , really hope everything works out for you and your family :wv
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