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pictureperfect Posts: 7
Yeah but did you ever cheat on your man with one of those guys?? Or any other guy for that matter? Yeah went to a counsellor when I discovered the affair first, it helped at the time but I suppose with the wedding being so close everything has come up again. She said this might happen actually, the mind is a funny thing - there really is no hiding from yourself is there?
ceedy Posts: 67
He's come on in leaps and bounds by giving you his facebook password etc, ex'd the exs and stuff... What more do you want... He doens't seem to be hiding anything... But did you say he cheated early on? How early on? Having been cheated on by an ex not so early on, all I can say is, if it was in a time scale of less than the first year and half, I'd be out of there. But seeing as you are still with him... tricky... if invites are not gone out and massive plans underway, face/future heartache may be saved by easing off with things until trust issues sorted? Take care :wv
kala Posts: 1937
sounds like as if you don't trust him. i personally wouldn't like it either if he was in contact with his exes on facebbok, but why did you go nosing into who his friends are in facebook in the first place. you are prob insecure with him. can understand that you have a good relationship with this man but trusting him in causing you to be insecure. rem you are marrying him not his family. you need to talk with him, tell him how being in contact with his exes is doing you both no justice.how would he feel if the shoe were on the other foot. i personally couldn't marry someone i didn't trust or who made me very insecure, but then you are not me. you are the one that can only make this decision. yes you love him enough to marry him ,but does he love you. why is he being involved with his exes from the past. i know its prob harmless but with his track record i wouldn't trust him as far as i'd throw him. think you deserve better. you sound a lovely genuine sincere girl who needs to be treated alot better than this. my sis is getting married in june to a guy who cheated on her 2 years into their relationship.she is so nervous anytime he goes out (not that often) and gets very jealous and nervous of him working around women as he recently changed jobs.- it wouldn't be me. if i ever found out hubby cheated on me- he'd be out the door. i wouldn't stay in the relationship for the sake of it.
pictureperfect Posts: 7
I wasn't really nosing around, actually I looked at his friends list to see if I could contact a couple we know so I could get their address for the invites. I thought they might be in there, but no, it was just a couple of other guys and the exes at that stage. Anyway no I don't trust him and I'm fully aware of that. I'm not in denial at all and I think that anyone who marries a man she doesn't trust is a fool. I thought I was over it but my reaction to this has shown me that I'm not. The wedding is off for now anyway.
jellywellies Posts: 2268
Hey pictureperfect - how you feelin about it all? Fair play to you for havin the guts to stand up and talk through things with him - from reading a lot on here many girls just go along with things.
tlove Posts: 572
[quote="pictureperfect":3vwtqt67]I wasn't really nosing around, [b:3vwtqt67]actually I looked at [/b:3vwtqt67][b:3vwtqt67]his friends list to see if I could contact a couple[/b:3vwtqt67] [b:3vwtqt67]we know so I[/b:3vwtqt67] could get their address for the invites. I thought they might be in there, but no, it was just a couple of other guys and the exes at that stage. Anyway no I don't trust him and I'm fully aware of that. I'm not in denial at all and I think that anyone who marries a man she doesn't trust is a fool. I thought I was over it but my reaction to this has shown me that I'm not. The wedding is off for now anyway.[/quote:3vwtqt67] I thought he only signed up the day before! Id say you were being nosey
bangles Posts: 35
O:o)
tlove Posts: 572
I thought this was a bizarr post...now its deleted!!
pictureperfect Posts: 7
Don't know what to do now.I talked to him and we agreed to postpone the wedding until I was sure about trusting him. We werent havin a big wedding so it wasnt a problem. He has been pushing me to set another date but I wanted to go to more counselling first.He said well if you can't trust me whats the point and he's left.What am I going to do? I only wanted more time. :o( :o(