sitting in tears

We've Moved!

Our wonderful discussion forums have now moved to Facebook...

Click to join us in our HIGM ("Help I'm Getting Married") group!

anon12 Posts: 3
Have went anon for this just looking for a bit advise. Have had a huge row with OH this morning over something stupid anyway bottom line is i am 18 weeks pregnant and having a bit of a hard time i lost my baby before and just constantly worried i no it must be hard for oh but i try to hide a lot of my tears from him as he does not cope with tears anyway today a huge argument started over me forgetting to get him a top up for his mobile phone, He told me to f*ck off back to my mums and that i was a fat B*as*a*d. He then stormed out with his golf clubs leaving me sitting in tears, i just do not no what to do, Ihave no family here or really friends only his pals OHs as i left my family to move and live with him, Should i just pack my bags and go, he said i should go and bring the baby up my self i really do not no what to do think i am going mad.
Sweets08 Posts: 958
Oh my god you poor thing, your OH is being so insensitive towards you, cant believe he called you those things, unbelievable. Does he know how worried you are about the pregnancy?? I wouldn't leave cos thats not going to solve anything you need to talk to him about your worries and make him see that this is not an easy time for you and a bit of compassion on his behalf wouldn't go astray. In the meantime why dont you give your mam a call if she's too far away for you to visit, bet she'll make you feel way better in no-time :action32
MrsM2008 Posts: 158
You poor thing .. that is just not on! Would he speak to you like that often? It sounds like it was said in the heed of the hunt, my DH would often say things to me in an arguement but im sorry it would break my heart if he spoke to me like that and i was pregnant. Is there any way you could sit him down and explain how crap it makes you feel when he speaks to you like that? Any word from his since he left? It must be so hard with no friends around you, would he be taking advantage of that? Heres a hug for you :action32
Anonymous Posts: 24542
.wrong post
doesmybumlookbiginthis? Posts: 480
JESUS CHRIST-HES A COMPLETE TOOL! i know its hard to see yourself coping without him as your pregnant with his baby but i have been there myself and moved on-hes telling you hes not ready and not sure he wants you or baby and im not sure hed be capable of changing that opinion now that he's actually come out and said it to you....i would tell the cheeky fucker to go and jump and i would pack up your stuff and babys and be gone-back to family, a kind friend or a hostel or wherever u can until you get sorted-he sounds like hes not ready for the changes that are taking place in his and your lives at the min-which doesnt bode well for the future when baby has arrived! the thing is as hard as it may be for you-you will manage and he will have to face up to the financial responsibilty he has for his child even if he doesnt want to be part of raising the baby! How dare he speak to you like that anyway-who does he think he is? fucking idiot! i dont know what your row was about but to be honest it shouldnt matter-if he loved you he wouldnt dare make comments like those- he could be panicking at the thought of all the responsibility but as they say "the toothpaste is out of the tube" so he needs to deal with it!
vitamin1 Posts: 565
go where you feel happy & secure there is no need to put up with that treatment..i would go back to mum if i were you you nor your baby need the stress!!take care
Hepburn Posts: 4081
Does he talk to you like that on a regular basis? If so, go! ASAP.
travellerone Posts: 13
What a selfish yoke! How often does he speak to you like that! There is absolutely no excuse for it, none. Stand up for yourself girl! You are in a vulnerable state and he should appreciate that and show you extra love if anything. Do you have anyone you can call on? How far away is home? BIG BIG HUGS!
anon12 Posts: 3
Thanks everyone, have been crying all day just cant stop, have also noticed that he has taken his work clothes so i take it he will not be back tonight, It is just so out of caracter for him cannot beleive the outburts this morning all because i forgot to top up his mobile, we do not have many arguments he does have a bit of a quick temper tho, to be honest i think he is trying to put to the back of him mind that i am pregnant again incase anything happens this time he does not really talk about the baby at all. my mum family and friends are in scotland not to far i no. Really feel like i have been kicked in the teeth and just cant stop the tears think because i cant talk to him about it ether makes it worse, thank you all for listening to me dont feel so alone x x
Sophia Posts: 117
You poor, poor love. You and the baby DO NOT need this stress. I, like yourself, have had a loss (more than one) and know how heartbreaking it was for both myself & DH and know how stressful it is to go through another pregnancy and the stress of worrying if it will go right so you really don't need this. Your DH is being absolutely rotten. No excuse for speaking to you like that. You don't have to put up with that and you are definitely better off going somewhere where you feel safe and secure, even it means going to your family in Scotland. Take care of yourself and of your baby. :xxx